Thursday, November 8, 2012

Jackie's Tram Rules

I ride the tram everyday to and from work. There are two trams that run the entire length of town that diverge on the ends, and on weekdays you can generally count on an A tram showing up every 8 minutes or so. Despite this frequency, if you try to take the tram between say about 8:30 and 10:30 in the morning or around 5 pm, you will be lucky to find room enough to stand. Seriously, people pack it in. It's not my favorite, and really I think the greatest frustration comes from how other people respond to the situation. People these days seem a little short on common sense, so I decided to put out a list of Rules for Riding the Tram. I don't thinking I'm asking much. I just want people to follow a little simple etiquette and exercise some common courtesy, but maybe that is asking too much.

  • Advance as much as you can. If there's room further in the tram, move that way. Don't stand there and make the everyone else push around you. Worse, you prevent anyone else from standing in that space and force other areas of the tram to be even more crowded than they need to be. 
  • If the tram is full, the tram is full. There comes a point where there just is not any more room on the tram. Sometimes you will have to wait for another tram to come along. They run every 8 minutes. I think you can wait. 
  • Try to take up as little space as you can. Now I'm not saying you need to squeeze yourself into a tiny ball in order to provide others with greater comfort, but you shouldn't be taking up unnecessary space. For example, allowing your backpack to lay sprawled on the ground is just rude. If you would just hold it, probably two people could be comfortably standing in that space. Similarly, your over-sized purse does not need it's own seat. 
  • The rush hour tram ride is not a good time for a make-out session. I don't care that PDA is much more socially acceptable in France than in the US. I don't care if being packed like sardines just ignites you with passion. Your passion can hold it until you get off the tram. The rest of us do not need to be involved in your relationship. 
  • Unless you are getting off at the next one or two stops don't stand right by the doors; you're blocking everybody from either getting on or off. So go look at the first rule again and get away from the gosh darn doors. 
  • If you have to bring your giant stroller on the tram with you, perhaps you should avoid running errands at rush hour. Just a thought. 
  • If you are going to the train station with a large suitcase, you may want to consider adjusting your schedule so as to ride the tram before or after the big rush, or you may want to find an alternative means of transportation. Don't haul your gigantic suitcase on here when there's barely enough room to breath. 
  • If someone's trying to get off the tram, move aside to let them through. Don't just stand there like the Tinman from the Wizard of Oz. People getting off means more room for you. 
  • There is no rule that you have to stand or sit next to your friends. You just might have to be separated for the 10 minute tram ride. 
  • Guys, be gentlemen. Don't make a little old lady stand when you have a seat. That's just so wrong. If I was your mama, I'd smack you. So rude, inconsiderate, and on top of it, un-manly. If you're such a tough guy, why is a nice little old lady standing while you're sitting down like a weakling? Get up and give her your seat, you jerk. 
These are just a small compilation of things I think the other tram riders need to be aware of. The number one request I have: Please Remember You Are NOT The Only Person In The World! Thank you. I'm Jackie and I approve this message. 

1 comment:

  1. There's nothing like a rush hour tram ride to spice up a relationship! Gets me going every time ;-)